Tuesday, July 31, 2012
The Children I Care For
A hodge podge of mother-thoughts from me to you:
*WHY. DOES. IT. HAVE. TO. BE. SO. HARD.
*Kids are hard. They are more hard than fun, cute, sweet and dear all combined. People told me that. I hated them for it. And now I am living it. I remember it not being so hard for awhile starting when Sienna was 18 months and lasting until Noah was born, when she was 25 months. Otherwise, hard, hard, hard. MUCH harder with two. But I don't see when it won't be hard. And that's what makes it all the more hard.
*Adam described Sienna perfectly the other day when my friend, Marilee, who'd not yet met my kids, was over and asking what Sienna was like. He said, "She's half sweetheart, half terrorist." No truer words were ever spoken. She defies all logic. Yes, she is 3, which means she is likely supposed to defy logic. It's all part of the phase. But, seriously. What planet did she come from? I scratch my head every day. Living with her is like living on a beautiful island in Hawaii next to a constantly erupting volcano. The scenery is lovely when she's sweet, but absolutely horrifying when she's exploding.
*We still call her Bird, Birdie or Bird Turd (under my breath). She will always be Bird. And I love that.
*She is killing it with the potty training. I started training her on Monday, July 16th and she hasn't had an accident for two weeks! It is making me love her through all the hard times. She loves peeing in the master bathroom toilet the best. She disappears for awhile, then runs out with no pants and says, "I peed!" Then I go help her put her panties and skirt or pants back on. Then we wash hands. Then she gets a treat! She poops, too! No big freaking deal! She just poops like it ain't no thing. Ahhhh, it makes me so happy. She even wears panties during nap time and does fine! Last night Adam accidentally left her panties on at bedtime and she woke up dry! She is just owning this potty thing. It is sooooooo awesome. I will gladly give her treats for a year after she uses the toilet. That is how I will pay her back for making the job I dreaded most come so easy.
*Noah's nicknames vary in levels of ridiculousness, but I think the one we use most at this point is Nobers. He is also The Great Magnificent Mysterious Magical Noberino or Noberini. Or just simply Mr. Nobers or Mr. Noah. To me, personally, his biggest fan (he returns the sentiment), he is just about any mushy term of endearment. For, you see, I have a crush on him.
*Lately my parenting strategy could be summed up in three easy steps. Pay attention, you never know when you will need this. 1. Try. 2. Give up. 3. Stop caring. It is a cycle that occurs at least 15 times per day. Example: "Sienna, stop splashing me in the face! Nobody likes to be splashed in the face." She keeps splashing anyway. Not wanting to get out of the pool to put her in time out, I give up. Then I proceed to splash her in the face. I guess this strategy is also known as: if you can't beat 'em, join 'em. You older parents, let me know if this is going to work long-term. Or if I should even do the "Try" part at all. Or if I should really "Try" not to "Give up." Oh well, too late. I've already stopped caring.
Sunday, July 22, 2012
Parenting and Phoenix and Cycling
*I've been thinking about patience as a muscle lately. It just came to me. One day we were all driving in the car and it was around 110 degrees outside and we were all flipping out. Noah was crying, Sienna was screaming, Adam was nigh on losing his marbles, and I ... I just had an epiphany. Oh, did I mention we were completely lost and due to meet someone 15 minutes ago? It happens when you move to a new place and the AC doesn't work when the outside temperature is over 100. Anyway, I decided right there that I would flex my patient muscle. I realized it was a good visualization mechanism because it seemed like something I could control. Keep screaming kids, I can flex this muscle all day. Not really. But I will try.
*Which brings me to last week. The Worst Week I've Had in a Long Time. We got used to having Adam around for about a month, so when he left for Amazon training in Seattle last Sunday, I knew it would suck. I was right. It was like being thrown into the lion's den. It didn't help that it was also the week I decided to 1) cut down on TV time for the kids, from 2-3 movies per day to 1 only in the evening, 2) delete dairy products from my diet after reading that it changed the complexion of one blogger, and 3) start potty training Sienna. I don't even know where to begin. Not turning on TV first thing in the morning was terrible. It meant I had to pay attention to the little people and maybe even (gulp) play with them (which bores me to tears 98.4% of the time). No dairy was fine in the milk department, but there was a particularly low point when I was handing out string cheese to my kids and did not partake. I lasted 5 days on that diet ... 'twas a bowl of cheese tortellini with Parmesan cheese on top (my childhood favie) that undid me. I could totally do that diet if I didn't feed my kids cheese and pasta and sometimes cheese and pasta combined into perfect little tortellini loops of pasta perfection. Sigh. I didn't see any signs of improvement really. But I'm pretty sure after I went back on, I broke out. So maybe I did improve. But probably not (or at least that's what I tell myself when I bite off the end of my mozza stick). Potty training ... well, somehow I calmed down a bit and Sienna grew up a bit and it happened to be a really good combination of changes because she hasn't had an accident since Wednesday. I'm not getting my hopes up, because there are usually potty problems that crop up here and there. Monday, Tuesday and especially Wednesday (The Day She Pooped in the Pool) were not so great. But then I think the cold shower after her Pool Poop was the wake up call. She understood consequences, and suddenly she was peeing in her little Froggy Potty with regularity, excitement, and precision. Now she just needs to poop. AND NOT IN THE POOL!
*The thing about coming from a place like Seattle to a place like Phoenix is that it's a relief. It's a relief to wake up and not wonder if the sun is going to come out. It just comes out. It comes out in full force. And that's all there is to it. I knew that this happened in places. Yes, I used to live in Southern California, you know. But here there is a warmth (ahem, a searing, scalding kind) that you don't have to question. It's chilly AC inside, it's a warm (hot, suffocating) blanket outside. It feels nice that it's not the other way around for once in 2 years.
*We were in a dust storm last night! We saw it in the distance as we were driving to Trader Joe's, a big, cloud-like wall of brown, then when we were done shopping, we stepped out into it. It wasn't as severe as I thought it'd be, but yes I did have a tad bit of grit in my eyes and teeth. And Noah was like, "Huh?" HE'S SO CUTE in case you were wondering.
*Another observation about Phoenix. I went to Home Depot the other day for spray paint. It was a little after 5 pm and I was dreading it because I thought for sure it'd be crazy busy. Nope, hardly a soul. I thought, "What is going on?? It's always busy here, especially at this time!" I had a thought: "Everybody has new houses, why would they need a fix-it-up place like this?" In Seattle, there is no shortage of old, fixer uppers that need plenty of the kind of stuff inside Home Depot. Just a thought. Who knows? Anyone care to fill me in on this?
*Adam took a most excellent bike ride which he said was the perfect ending to his wonderful time as a UW student (these guys were his classmates and some of his closest friends in the program). His friends posted pictures on Facebook, and I'd like to impart them to you now.
*Which brings me to last week. The Worst Week I've Had in a Long Time. We got used to having Adam around for about a month, so when he left for Amazon training in Seattle last Sunday, I knew it would suck. I was right. It was like being thrown into the lion's den. It didn't help that it was also the week I decided to 1) cut down on TV time for the kids, from 2-3 movies per day to 1 only in the evening, 2) delete dairy products from my diet after reading that it changed the complexion of one blogger, and 3) start potty training Sienna. I don't even know where to begin. Not turning on TV first thing in the morning was terrible. It meant I had to pay attention to the little people and maybe even (gulp) play with them (which bores me to tears 98.4% of the time). No dairy was fine in the milk department, but there was a particularly low point when I was handing out string cheese to my kids and did not partake. I lasted 5 days on that diet ... 'twas a bowl of cheese tortellini with Parmesan cheese on top (my childhood favie) that undid me. I could totally do that diet if I didn't feed my kids cheese and pasta and sometimes cheese and pasta combined into perfect little tortellini loops of pasta perfection. Sigh. I didn't see any signs of improvement really. But I'm pretty sure after I went back on, I broke out. So maybe I did improve. But probably not (or at least that's what I tell myself when I bite off the end of my mozza stick). Potty training ... well, somehow I calmed down a bit and Sienna grew up a bit and it happened to be a really good combination of changes because she hasn't had an accident since Wednesday. I'm not getting my hopes up, because there are usually potty problems that crop up here and there. Monday, Tuesday and especially Wednesday (The Day She Pooped in the Pool) were not so great. But then I think the cold shower after her Pool Poop was the wake up call. She understood consequences, and suddenly she was peeing in her little Froggy Potty with regularity, excitement, and precision. Now she just needs to poop. AND NOT IN THE POOL!
*The thing about coming from a place like Seattle to a place like Phoenix is that it's a relief. It's a relief to wake up and not wonder if the sun is going to come out. It just comes out. It comes out in full force. And that's all there is to it. I knew that this happened in places. Yes, I used to live in Southern California, you know. But here there is a warmth (ahem, a searing, scalding kind) that you don't have to question. It's chilly AC inside, it's a warm (hot, suffocating) blanket outside. It feels nice that it's not the other way around for once in 2 years.
*We were in a dust storm last night! We saw it in the distance as we were driving to Trader Joe's, a big, cloud-like wall of brown, then when we were done shopping, we stepped out into it. It wasn't as severe as I thought it'd be, but yes I did have a tad bit of grit in my eyes and teeth. And Noah was like, "Huh?" HE'S SO CUTE in case you were wondering.
*Another observation about Phoenix. I went to Home Depot the other day for spray paint. It was a little after 5 pm and I was dreading it because I thought for sure it'd be crazy busy. Nope, hardly a soul. I thought, "What is going on?? It's always busy here, especially at this time!" I had a thought: "Everybody has new houses, why would they need a fix-it-up place like this?" In Seattle, there is no shortage of old, fixer uppers that need plenty of the kind of stuff inside Home Depot. Just a thought. Who knows? Anyone care to fill me in on this?
*Adam took a most excellent bike ride which he said was the perfect ending to his wonderful time as a UW student (these guys were his classmates and some of his closest friends in the program). His friends posted pictures on Facebook, and I'd like to impart them to you now.
Thursday, July 19, 2012
Pictures to go with Post
And now for the pictures to go with my previous post!
These fine Seattle babes had a going away dinner for me before I left. So sweet! We ate at Jai Thai in Fremont (TDF!!) and shared desserts from (my fave) Simply Desserts and Bluebird Ice Cream. Then we hiked up the road to the famous Fremont Troll under the bridge which I had never been to! Isn't she a beaut! (Weirdest piece of "art" I've ever seen, but I can appreciate it because of the fairy tale it matches. I think...)
Adam's hard work all stacked with precision in our garage below.
Our last supper in Seattle was at Tutta Bella. Great Neopolitan pizza, my friends. Great. I could eat that stuff all day.
Goodbye 8513! We have loved you so!
Pow Wow colors.
They are not messing around with these moccasins. $300 folks! Handmade wonders.
The children were a sight in their full costumes. It was a feast for the senses - sound and colors and textures and movement. I can't wait to go again sometime!
Sienna living it up in the backyard at my parents' house. She chucked everything in the universe in that pool. Sorry about your drum and accordion, Mom! (She assured me that she will be buying a new one, no worries, especially because everybody hates it! Haha. Classic Mom.Teaching through torture. )
Speaking of which, she insisted we see the new dinosaur museum in Vernal! It was actually lovely. However, the most uproarious of creatures was not among the ancient ones. Sienna was a PILL that day.
Uncle Owen has been home all summer and we love a good dose of him when we can get it!
My mom always has the cutest aprons. I donned this to make brunch.
Ah, back to brunch. Not pictured: the panna cotta.
Bird! In cute little her-sized chairs.
Friends Shanna and Kassie plus offspring.
Christy with offspring.
Noah saying his first word: UH OH. CUTEST. THING. EEEEEVVVVVEEEEERRRR. He even will do it with a growl now if I instigate it, and Sienna and I die laughing every time. His little "O" shape he makes with his tiny mouth. PRICELESS.
And just like that we are in the land of heat, pools, brown, strip malls, chains, wide, new streets, large intersections, cacti, and adobe.
In-N-Out is a beautiful thing. We've been twice already.
And thus it begins. Two years of school over and back to the working life.
He has been in Seattle all week for training and gets home tomorrow.
Monday, July 16, 2012
Roosy Time & Phoenix Phun & My Pumper
I have lost all desire to put together a proper post with pictures, so tonight you shall have only words! Sorry. But not really. Because blogging takes way too much time anymore. If you really want to know what I'm up to you can follow me on Instagram. My handle is @mwaregram. It's Facebooking and blogging combined and is the easiest and most fun way to share bits and pieces of our everyday life. It's the best way for me to find the silver lining in my everyday madness whether I share pictures on it or just enjoy everybody else's snapshots of daily life.
First off: Roosy Time. I spent a week in Roosevelt with my family while Adam and his dad drove our moving truck from Seattle to Phoenix. Adam really must get the Medal of Honor for this one. He worked tirelessly without help for days getting all our crap together while the kids and I had the best vacation I could've asked for. His dad was so generous to offer his help as well. They had a looooong drive. And, I repeat, it was all done while the kids and I were PLAYING. Husband and father-in-law of the year, I tell you! After getting to our new apartment and putting everything back together Adam declared: "I will never do that again!" I don't blame him. I married a good man.
Anyway, upon landing in Utah the kids and I met up with my parents, my sister, Heather, and my friend, Miriam, plus all our kids at Liberty Park in SLC. That was a fantastic reunion. Way too short, of course. But I have hope that there will come a day when we can all escape together on a trip without kids and really have time to talk about life as we know it all these years after getting married and having kids. We could all talk for days and never stop. Alas, we are not the carefree girls of yore. Family beckons, and we must heed. Thank goodness for Facebook, blogging, and, yes, Instagram.
My parents and I stayed the night in SLC and then headed to Roosevelt. The more I visit Roosevelt, the more I want to live there. I'd wake up or sleep in depending on whether my parents scooped up the early-rising children. Sienna would say, first thing, "I want to go outside." Before breakfast, before diaper-change, before anything. We'd open the back door, and that's where she'd stay for the majority of the day: out back somewhere, being free. It does my heart good to see that kind of freedom being reinvigorated into the heart of a city child. It made me realize how much I worry about her on a daily basis - will she get hit by a car, will she get snatched up by a stranger, will she run too far away at the park? Living in a cramped city is exhausting that way, especially since we didn't have sidewalks on our side of the street. But living in a rural place is so refreshing! I didn't worry about crime or cars! They do still exist in Roosevelt, but not as far as I was concerned. Every morning my mom or dad would watch the kids while I walked to the gym. Walked! To the gym! In the SUN! Nobody anywhere, just leash-less dogs! It was glorious. Then I showered and emerged, feigning interest in caring for my children. My mom knows the truth: I just want to forget about them completely when I'm in Roosy. And she is a very willing fill-in mom, yay, grandmom. (I just, for the first time, realized why that's what we call them! They really are grand!) I got to make Harvest Halo pancakes, the long lost mix resurrected by my mom. They weren't as good as I remembered them. But still, a taste of home. I had some friends over for brunch one morning, Shanna, Kassie and Christy. Always, always good to see them! Yes, the more I stay away, the more I treasure the people I grew up with. You don't have to explain anything to these people. It's a relief. I got ambitious and made two Ina Garten recipes I'd been eyeing for awhile, lemon yogurt pound cake and panna cotta with berries. Both quite fantastic, if I do say so myself. There were several trips to the pool with the kiddies, including on July 4th, the day I most look forward to during the year, and the day that the whole family went separate ways. Owen played in a volleyball tournament all day, Roger and Karie took a whole brood of kids boating, mom and dad went to a family reunion in SLC, and Sienna, Noah and I .... had a picnic in the park with Taco Time and then went to the pool. Haha. Next time we'll plan ahead better, no? Hmm? I also became addicted to Downton Abbey while in Roosevelt. I brought mom's DVDs home and Adam joined me in watching both seasons. So, so good. Roosevelt was fantastic as it always is in the summertime. And what I really meant to say is that I want to move there ... kind of.
Onto Phoenix Phun! The only temperatures registering on my thermometer are Hot as Blazes and Torture. But wait! A wild card in July! There's something called Monsoon Season. It's a fancy way of saying it gets cloudy and rains. That happened a few days ago and it was delightful! I am really loving Phoenix so far. We moved into a great ward with our friends Curtis and Candace and their two kids, so it'll be so fun to spend more time with them. I have other friends scattered around here. It's fun to play "spot the Mormon" everywhere I go. The place is swarming with them, I'm pretty sure, mostly because long shorts and sleeves is only something a cuh-razy Mormon would wear in 100 degrees, me included, which is why I have not bothered to get ready from day one of arriving. Why when I just sweat through everything anyway? No point. Phoenix has every chain known to mankind. How easy this makes my life! I will embrace it wholeheartedly. Although I am already done with Walmart after 3 trips. No worries, Target is just a bit further down the way. Seriously, chain heaven! Embrace! Most importantly, we have 4 pools in our enormous apartment complex, one of which is a 30 second walk. It is saving our sizzling bacon every morning around 11. Adam started work today in Seattle (har har), but will be back on Friday. Amazon in Arizona, here we come!
And now, for the real matter at hand: My Pumper. I found out at the beginning of June that I have to have a little something called open heart surgery. I've had a faulty valve my whole life and have known that surgery was inevitable, but I always thought it'd be much later in life, like my 50s or 60s. Surprise! It's happening right at the beginning of my 30s. Bad timing because of the move, for sure, but bad timing because surgery of any kind is never on good timing! Right?! When we went to the appointment and found out Adam and our kids were there. It ended up being a 3 hour visit and was rather chaotic. Would've been a good time to have a nanny pop out of the wall. Hey, pop-out-nanny, someone needs to get on that business idea. After the doctors told us the news, they were kind enough to track down two men who've had the surgery who happened to be at the hospital filming a documentary called Flat Line to Finish Line about one of the men who'd flat-lined on the operating table and is now about to finish his third IronMan triathlon in a few months. HELLO aortic valve replacement success story! They were kind enough to talk to me for about an hour about their experiences with the surgery. They were very positive and have led active lives before and after the surgery, so that gives me great hope. However, mine is complicated by the fact that I also have an enlarged heart muscle, so I won't ever be doing things like IronMan triathlons because it's always been that element of my heart that has limited my activity the most. They both have tissue valves (from pigs! one knew his was from a Jimmy Dean farm! awesome! if only i could be so lucky!) and my other option is a mechanical valve. There are both huge pros and cons to both. The tissue valve requires replacement surgery in 10-15 years but I could have children on it. The mechanical valve lasts forever but requires blood thinner medicine everyday that has side effects and would cause birth defects (I'd get my tubes tied on that one). I have NO IDEA which one to choose. Good and bad arguments for both. I'm not dying to have more kids but I'm also not dying to have blood thinners every day. Meh. Time will tell. We are just in the thick of trying to find a good doctor on our insurance. The health care system!!! That is a paragraph for another day.
Goodnight.
First off: Roosy Time. I spent a week in Roosevelt with my family while Adam and his dad drove our moving truck from Seattle to Phoenix. Adam really must get the Medal of Honor for this one. He worked tirelessly without help for days getting all our crap together while the kids and I had the best vacation I could've asked for. His dad was so generous to offer his help as well. They had a looooong drive. And, I repeat, it was all done while the kids and I were PLAYING. Husband and father-in-law of the year, I tell you! After getting to our new apartment and putting everything back together Adam declared: "I will never do that again!" I don't blame him. I married a good man.
Anyway, upon landing in Utah the kids and I met up with my parents, my sister, Heather, and my friend, Miriam, plus all our kids at Liberty Park in SLC. That was a fantastic reunion. Way too short, of course. But I have hope that there will come a day when we can all escape together on a trip without kids and really have time to talk about life as we know it all these years after getting married and having kids. We could all talk for days and never stop. Alas, we are not the carefree girls of yore. Family beckons, and we must heed. Thank goodness for Facebook, blogging, and, yes, Instagram.
My parents and I stayed the night in SLC and then headed to Roosevelt. The more I visit Roosevelt, the more I want to live there. I'd wake up or sleep in depending on whether my parents scooped up the early-rising children. Sienna would say, first thing, "I want to go outside." Before breakfast, before diaper-change, before anything. We'd open the back door, and that's where she'd stay for the majority of the day: out back somewhere, being free. It does my heart good to see that kind of freedom being reinvigorated into the heart of a city child. It made me realize how much I worry about her on a daily basis - will she get hit by a car, will she get snatched up by a stranger, will she run too far away at the park? Living in a cramped city is exhausting that way, especially since we didn't have sidewalks on our side of the street. But living in a rural place is so refreshing! I didn't worry about crime or cars! They do still exist in Roosevelt, but not as far as I was concerned. Every morning my mom or dad would watch the kids while I walked to the gym. Walked! To the gym! In the SUN! Nobody anywhere, just leash-less dogs! It was glorious. Then I showered and emerged, feigning interest in caring for my children. My mom knows the truth: I just want to forget about them completely when I'm in Roosy. And she is a very willing fill-in mom, yay, grandmom. (I just, for the first time, realized why that's what we call them! They really are grand!) I got to make Harvest Halo pancakes, the long lost mix resurrected by my mom. They weren't as good as I remembered them. But still, a taste of home. I had some friends over for brunch one morning, Shanna, Kassie and Christy. Always, always good to see them! Yes, the more I stay away, the more I treasure the people I grew up with. You don't have to explain anything to these people. It's a relief. I got ambitious and made two Ina Garten recipes I'd been eyeing for awhile, lemon yogurt pound cake and panna cotta with berries. Both quite fantastic, if I do say so myself. There were several trips to the pool with the kiddies, including on July 4th, the day I most look forward to during the year, and the day that the whole family went separate ways. Owen played in a volleyball tournament all day, Roger and Karie took a whole brood of kids boating, mom and dad went to a family reunion in SLC, and Sienna, Noah and I .... had a picnic in the park with Taco Time and then went to the pool. Haha. Next time we'll plan ahead better, no? Hmm? I also became addicted to Downton Abbey while in Roosevelt. I brought mom's DVDs home and Adam joined me in watching both seasons. So, so good. Roosevelt was fantastic as it always is in the summertime. And what I really meant to say is that I want to move there ... kind of.
Onto Phoenix Phun! The only temperatures registering on my thermometer are Hot as Blazes and Torture. But wait! A wild card in July! There's something called Monsoon Season. It's a fancy way of saying it gets cloudy and rains. That happened a few days ago and it was delightful! I am really loving Phoenix so far. We moved into a great ward with our friends Curtis and Candace and their two kids, so it'll be so fun to spend more time with them. I have other friends scattered around here. It's fun to play "spot the Mormon" everywhere I go. The place is swarming with them, I'm pretty sure, mostly because long shorts and sleeves is only something a cuh-razy Mormon would wear in 100 degrees, me included, which is why I have not bothered to get ready from day one of arriving. Why when I just sweat through everything anyway? No point. Phoenix has every chain known to mankind. How easy this makes my life! I will embrace it wholeheartedly. Although I am already done with Walmart after 3 trips. No worries, Target is just a bit further down the way. Seriously, chain heaven! Embrace! Most importantly, we have 4 pools in our enormous apartment complex, one of which is a 30 second walk. It is saving our sizzling bacon every morning around 11. Adam started work today in Seattle (har har), but will be back on Friday. Amazon in Arizona, here we come!
And now, for the real matter at hand: My Pumper. I found out at the beginning of June that I have to have a little something called open heart surgery. I've had a faulty valve my whole life and have known that surgery was inevitable, but I always thought it'd be much later in life, like my 50s or 60s. Surprise! It's happening right at the beginning of my 30s. Bad timing because of the move, for sure, but bad timing because surgery of any kind is never on good timing! Right?! When we went to the appointment and found out Adam and our kids were there. It ended up being a 3 hour visit and was rather chaotic. Would've been a good time to have a nanny pop out of the wall. Hey, pop-out-nanny, someone needs to get on that business idea. After the doctors told us the news, they were kind enough to track down two men who've had the surgery who happened to be at the hospital filming a documentary called Flat Line to Finish Line about one of the men who'd flat-lined on the operating table and is now about to finish his third IronMan triathlon in a few months. HELLO aortic valve replacement success story! They were kind enough to talk to me for about an hour about their experiences with the surgery. They were very positive and have led active lives before and after the surgery, so that gives me great hope. However, mine is complicated by the fact that I also have an enlarged heart muscle, so I won't ever be doing things like IronMan triathlons because it's always been that element of my heart that has limited my activity the most. They both have tissue valves (from pigs! one knew his was from a Jimmy Dean farm! awesome! if only i could be so lucky!) and my other option is a mechanical valve. There are both huge pros and cons to both. The tissue valve requires replacement surgery in 10-15 years but I could have children on it. The mechanical valve lasts forever but requires blood thinner medicine everyday that has side effects and would cause birth defects (I'd get my tubes tied on that one). I have NO IDEA which one to choose. Good and bad arguments for both. I'm not dying to have more kids but I'm also not dying to have blood thinners every day. Meh. Time will tell. We are just in the thick of trying to find a good doctor on our insurance. The health care system!!! That is a paragraph for another day.
Goodnight.
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