Christmas Comments

I got a Canon XSi for an early Christmas present and am loving the clear pictures it takes. The indoor shots still need help but I really love the outdoor ones. I'm starting photography classes in January so my shots can only get better. Can't wait!!

Here's a sampling of them along with a Christmas commentary.

Adam's 101 year old great grandma passed away which provided mostly a happy occasion: we both got out of work a couple days early and spent some surprise time with Adam's family plus got in on his other grandma's huge annual Christmas bash. Here we are in front of her tree after all the wreckage was cleared (dozens of tiny kids ripping thousands of presents open).

My wish for seeing the lights on SLC's temple square was granted. Except where were the lights this year? Did anyone else think they chinced? I was confused. But still loved it.

This manger scene in front of the temple was breathtaking.

After some days in SLC, we went home to Roosy. Adam is a natural dad already ... here he is reading a story ... er ... showing a photo album to Haven.

We went sledding at Constitution Park. Isabelle did snow angels.

Mom became an eskimo. Mark did quality control.

Haven hates the cold and snow.

Christmas Eve crab fest came off without a hitch. Heather is so hardcore she cracks crab legs with her bare teeth.

Allen ate 3/4s of the bucket o' crab legs by himself. I was not surprised but I was pretty grossed out.

Took a couple trips to the Vernal temple. I think it's the first time Adam and I have returned together since we were married there 2.5 years ago. And we did sealings this time around. Ahhhh. Memorable.

A Happy Holiday Thong to You, Two!

We had our annual homemade gift exchange on Christmas Eve and guess the lucky person who benefitted from my rudimentary sewing skillz? Adam! So this is what he got. A sparkly, stretchy, sequiney, cheetahy holiday thong or two. Rar. These pictures say it all.

Pic 1. Oh crap, this is embarrassing. Parents-in-law five feet away. Act cool. Act cool.

Pic 2. Ahh, much stretchier than anticipated. I'll try this on very soon.

Pic 3. These sequins don't stretch. I will wear it as an eye patch.

Pic 4. "The thing about this gift is I don't know if it's for ME or YOU."

Both. Duh.

We'll Miss You Grandma!

Great Grandma MacKay passed away yesterday at the age of 101.

We love you Grandma! And we will see you soon!

Why You Should Play Santa & Mrs. Claus at Least Once

Adam was asked to play Santa at this year's ward Christmas party. His reply to the asker: "You know I'm really skinny, right?" Asker was not deterred. So we headed to the store and got three big bags of polyfil and prepared to make him a jolly, believable Santa. I was Santa's helper, which meant I was the stuffer of the costume behind the scenes. We ended up using 1/2 a bag of polyfil. Turns out you don't want to scare the kids by showing up as morbidly obese Santa. We removed his lap fat and butt fat and just kept it simple with the bowl full of jelly: belly fat.

I thought we'd pass the evening as bored, dutiful servants, but it actually turned out to be really fun. Here's what went down:

1. Kids still believe in Santa. Who knew?

2. Seeing firsthand the cruelty of parents and just how far they will push their screaming toddlers just for that token photo op.

3. Kids love Santa, but what they really love are Mrs. Claus' fuzzy knee socks.

4. Listening in as Santa makes promises no parent can keep and then finishing off the visit with a nice stick of pure sugar from me.

5. Seeing the confusion and horror on kids' faces as wholesome Sister Ware sits on Santa's lap for her very own photo op.

6. Taking the kids' letters home and laughing really hard at them, especially the ones with no writing, just stickers.

Hello Panel. It's (Not) So Nice to Meet You.

{not panel pants, but see what I have to look forward to? "she'll love the 9-inch zipper and pleated front."}


Over Thanksgiving, I went maternity clothes shopping for the first time with my mother-in-law and sister-in-law. And it was inside the St. George Motherhood Maternity that I bravely said hello to panel pants. I even got a pair - brown, comfy, cargo type (they are cuter than they sound). But I couldn't stomach the panel jeans, and my stomach wouldn't hold them up. But all that is quickly changing. My pants are snug today. They were yesterday, too. And the skirt I wore on Monday was snug. I am sensing a pattern here. Panel pants (and jeans and skirts) are in my very near future. I cower to think of it.

So, tell me, what panel pants have worked well for you? I need some serious recommendations, here.

Dressy (for work) and casual (jeans)?

What about skirts/dresses?

And what do you think of the just the panel (sans pants)? You know, that band that supposedly holds up your regular pants so you never have to actually buy maternity pants?

Sarah

My sweet little second cousin, Sarah, passed away last week from a brain tumor. Her funeral was today. I'm passing along my love-vibes to their family today since I could not be there.

Center of the Universe

Some things just don't go together. Handel's Messiah and Jingle Bells. Lucky Charms and gravy. Italy and Baseball. But when I was 20 years old I knocked on a door in Florence and met an Italian so in love with baseball he could barely stop talking about it. He had a poster of Roger Clemens. His favorite player of all time was Pete Rose. He was ON A BASEBALL TEAM. This guy even looked like a baseball player. If it hadn't been for the Italian coming out his mouth I'd have thought he was from Cincinnati.

There are things that everyone in the U.S. knows about baseball: the bases are 90 feet apart, Bonds is the home run king*, Rawlings makes the official ball, the Dodgers used to play in Brooklyn, the Cubs are cursed. But NOBODY knows this stuff in Europe. Nobody but that one guy, anyway. Most Europeans I know can't distinguish baseball from cricket. When you ask a European what he knows about baseball he says 'Yankees!' It doesn't even cross his mind that there's 100 years of history out there. Words like 'the Babe,' 'the Negro Leagues,' and 'walk off home run' stir all kinds of emotion and memories in us, but mean nothing to most Europeans.

Not that it's any different here in America. Have you ever seen news coverage of the Tour de France or the Giro d'Italia? You haven't. It gets like 15 seconds on Sports Center right before a commercial break, and then only if Ricco gets caught in the team bus injecting himself with EPO.

What's the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the words 'professional cycling?' Admit it, it's Lance Armstrong right? The history of cycling is full of legendary riders, rivalry, miracles, heroes, and tragedy. Cycling has been around just as long as baseball and all most Americans know about it is the name of one cocky Texan.

Prepare to be educated.

Because I Know You Want To

You can follow me on Twitter! Scroll down a bit and to the right and there I am! I'm on it all day for work, so why not read about what's going on in my head (and at my company) for all those precious hours I can't blog? Except that I'm blogging now. And I'm at work. Okay, done blogging.

A Strong Dose of Pepto

Is it wrong to love this dress?

What has two wheels and costs $5,000?

Soon I will be making the biggest decision of my life, and I don't say that lightly. I don't just mean my life up to this point, I mean my entire life. That is to say that I have never, nor will I ever, come to a more important crossroad than this. The dilemma: So many bikes, and I can only buy one.

What? That's like asking Steinbrenner to choose between Jeter and A-Rod, or asking Barack to choose only one former Clinton administration official. That's like saying 'Who's better? President Hinckley or President Monson?' Not a fair question.

Welp, I've narrowed it down to three. Here they are, in no particular order.

Felt F2SL $4,999



Pros: Felt gives you great bang for your buck. The brand is known world wide, sponsers arguably the best American based road cycling team (Garmin-Slipstream), and is based in Irvine which is clearly awesome. Note the Dura-ace componants. For those of you who don't speak bike, Dura-ace is Shimano's top of the line shiz. What Dura-ace lacks in Campagnolo sex-appeal, it makes up in pedigree and general awesomeness. Dura-ace is not found on any other bike at this pricepoint period.

Cons: The Felt brand is completely void of Euro-cred Also, many hard core roadies are suspicious of Felt, b/c no one can figure out how the crap the company can afford to sell its bikes so cheaply. They must be using child labor or substandard carbon fibre or something. And yes, it's spelled 'fibre.' No comments about that please. Lastly, I don't really love the colours.

2009 Colnago CLX - $4,700



Pros: Style is everything in cycling and riding a Colnago is like sipping a stiff martini while wearing your collar up. A man on a Colnago can impregnate a woman just by glancing at her as he speeds by. People don't know about that in America, but in Italy it's a well known fact. Colnagos are indicative of impeccable taste and class. Dudes who ride them always buy clothes that fit, never take their sunglasses off while indoors, and ALWAYS have two or three days of stubble on their face even right after a shave. Do I need to continue? Just look at that thing! Actually, don't look too long ladies... you never know!

Cons: The setup in my price range comes with Campagnolo Centaur componants. As mentioned above, Campy destroys Shimano when it comes to style, but the Centaur gruppo is Campy's 4th best setup.

Specialized Tarmac Expert - $3,700



Pros: This is the safe, practical choice. Specialized is probably America's most trusted brand. The Tarmac model is used by Pros everywhere, including world champ Paolo Bettini, and two time Paris-Roubaix champ, serial cocain user, and cradle robber Tom Boonen (although he doesn't ride the Tarmac in Paris-Roubaix, let's make that clear). With Shimano Ultegra componants (Shimano's second tier stuff) it's pretty well tricked out. Plus, you can't beat that price.

Cons: Specialized is The Man, and is the favorite bike of Dentists everywhere. I would never make fun of dentists, but you get what I mean. In my opinion the brand has a funny way of sucking the life out of you and making you a total Fred (wannabe). I can say this because I currently ride a Trek, which does the same thing, only worse. Now I'm not saying all Specialized riders are freds, I'm just saying a that a lot of freds ride Specialized. Also, Irvine cyclists at large have a very unhealthy obsession with Specialized bikes. It doesn't help that the biggest bike shop in town is a Specialized dealer.

So what am I going to do? Right now I completely torn. It's really quite the dilemma isn't it? Congrats if you're still reading. I'm sure I lost most of you before the first pic.

Spiffy

Jackets on: Jackets off:

One holiday party down, two more to go.

Next up: Santa and his little helper.

Pardon Me

M-Ware here. I interrupt this political chit-chat to show you my holiday outfit.

Here's the story: my mom gave me $100 bucks a few months ago so I could get a Shabby Apple dress because we had both been lusting after them for awhile and she wanted to be really generous and let me splurge. I ordered A Sunday Afternoon; it came and it didn't cover my garments. Apparently I am as tall as the model because it hit me exactly where it hits her. I sent them an email telling them I was sorely disappointed in the undies-showing (because isn't the store all about covering without wearing extra under-layers? yes, it is.). I sent it back and ordered Park Avenue. It's not in stock and they don't know how long until it will be available again. How do clothing stores get away with this nonsensical excuse? How can you not know when your next shipment is coming in? You run a clothing store, don't you? You manage your inventory with precision, right? You plan for people to be ordering your stuff, yeah? Bah. Seriously, bah. Bordering on bah-humbug, that's the kind of bah I'm talking about.

So, I got my refund and headed to Target on Tuesday. In about 25 minutes I secured a top, skirt, jacket, shoes and earrings for $104. I LOVE this outfit. It's modest, it's shiny, it's cheap and it makes me feel like it really IS December around this stinky sun hole.

Behold:

Cropped, shiny, patterned, black jacket. I will be wearing this with many other things, and I can just taste the bargain following me well into the next year.

This looks purple, but it's actually navy. I'm trying to tone down the jewel colors because at last year's holiday party I wore a maroon top and DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT look good in that color, as evidenced by the photos that surfaced from that event. I'm staying away from all red-hued colors this holiday. I'm defining festive my own way. This skirt is actually a shiny black, and I can't get enough of it's tulip-ness. Yes, it looks like an actual tulip on. It's SO GREAT!

These shoes also come in yellow. COVET! I would have bought both colors if I had just a few more $$ and didn't really, really need black. Love these shoes because they're flat but not flat. Can you see the little heel? Makes a clicking sound when I'm walking on hard floors that makes me feel like a woman. Deck the freaking halls!

What's Wrong With Big Government?

In 2002, when I was in college, I stopped at a booth to register to vote. I started chatting with one of the volunteers. I was a political newbie at the time, so I asked the guy to explain to me the difference between Republicans and Democrats without using the word ‘abortion’. He said, “Republicans are the party of small government, Democrats are the party of big government.” I had taken enough American History to know the founders hated big government. I checked the box for Republican.

So until recently I’ve looked down on Dems for being the big government party. But like most things in government, it’s not that simple. It’s not just a question of large bureaucracies, unfair taxes, and invasive laws. The distinction is much more subtle.

Take the issue of seat belt laws. The conservative says government should stay out of our day-to-day decisions, while the liberal says mandating seat belt use protects everyone. The debate between big government and small is obvious. But the debate between privacy and safety is not.

Senator Harry Reid is the one who freed me from the small-government-is-always-better dogma. He said, “I am as much a believer in the genius of the American free-enterprise system as anyone, but it was not the market that built the Interstate Highway System, sent man to the moon, or conceived of Social Security, the greatest social program since the fishes and the loaves...Those things, and so many others, were brought to you by the genius of the American government.” Is Harry a socialist? No way! He’s just saying that a powerful government can do things a weak one can’t.

How 'bout one more quote? This time from Alexander Hamilton: “A government ought to contain in itself every power requisite to the full accomplishment of the objects committed to its care.”

Sometimes, bigger is better.

Step Two: Define the Rules

OK. Now that I'm out of the closet I can elaborate a little bit. I am writing about my decision to become an independent for three reasons: to force myself to study the issues, make decisions about what I believe, and learn to defend my opinions. For too long I have allowed myself to be defined by a party that only partially represents my beliefs and opinions. So I’m doing what I’ve always been afraid to do: I’m stepping into the ring, declaring what I believe, and welcoming discussion and criticism.

Sometimes our two-party system creates diehards with a “War in Heaven” mentality. They view one side as “good” and the other as “evil”, one pursuing happiness and the other destruction. I reject this. I believe both parties are good. Each is made up of patriotic men & women who share the same goals: a happy, prosperous, and safe America. Their ideas and methods may differ, but to a large extent their goals, motivations, and visions of the future do not.

How about an example? Let’s say I am for personal retirement accounts and you are for increasing social security taxes. I will never say that you are wrong, or dumb, or a socialist, or un-patriotic, because the entitlement problem is far too complicated to be reduced to a simple right or wrong. Maybe your idea would be more successful than mine, but that doesn’t mean my idea is wrong, it means that yours is better.

So here’s how this is going to work. I’m going to write about what I think. If I’m way off, tell me, and then tell me why. I will listen to what you say, and then I will either change my opinion, or I won’t. The important thing to remember is that a Republican and a Democrat may have different ideas, but they both want to improve our country, and there is nothing un-American about that.

I am NOT a Republican. There! I said it!

Oh man, that felt good! (By the way, this is Adam talking) In subsequent posts I will bore you with greater detail regarding how I’ve come to this decision. But first I want to get my coming-out party out of the way. Let me begin by briefly stating my reasons for becoming an Independent:

1. I do not believe that one party is good or right, and that the other is bad, evil, and wrong.

2. I believe Republicans are right on some issues and that Democrats are right on others.

3. My opinions on moral and social issues are generally conservative.

4. My opinions on fiscal, environmental, energy, entitlement, and health care policy are generally democratic.

5. There are a slew of other issues about which I have either have no opinion (ethics reform, infrastructure, Israel), or no idea (Iraq, taxes, economic crisis).

6. I generally believe our politicians are good, responsible, and patriotic, no matter their party affiliation.

7. I generally do not react to scare-tactics or “scandals” of any kind (i.e. red phones ringing at night, warnings of impending socialism, wardrobe-gate, etc) no matter the origin or target.

So there you have it. Is Martha’s blog the appropriate place to be making this declaration of independence? Maybe not… but I don’t have a blog, facebook has a 10 character limit under “political views”, and testimony meeting was really the only other good option.

INDEPENDENTS OF THE WORLD...UNITE!!!